Runaway Mayhem
by scottsman
Summary: What if the first time that Wendy saw Peter he was making fools out of two men who were trying to catch him and take him to the orphanage. (something to make you laugh(2003 movieverse)PLEASE READ AND REVIEW


"Walk toward me child that I may appraise you." Said Aunt Millicent as she sat in the Darling Parlor. Wendy Moira Angela Darling her twelve- year- old niece walked toward her trying to suppress her giggles. Just then the doorbell jangled. Millicent told Mary, who had risen partway out of her chair, to sit back down that she would get the door. Millicent answered the door to find a large man and a somewhat disheveled man standing there trying to look official.

"Evening Mum," said the smaller man, " I'm Thaddeus Dink and this is Johnny Smathers we are from the local orphanage and were are trying to locate a runaway. He has Light hair andazure eyes is wearing greenand and his name is Peter. He was seen heading in this direction were wondered if anyone here had seen him?"

"Well I've not seen your runaway," said Millicent, "but I certainly hope you find him."

"Don't worry about that, Mum," replied the man, "well get him, you know what they call us down at Scotland Yard?"

"Yeah," interrupted a boy's voice behind them, "The village idiots!"

They all turned around to see this mysterious boy named Peter sitting perched on the back of the sofa popping one of the chocolates from the candy dish into his mouth all with a cocky smirk on his face. The bigger of the two men said,

"Boss its him!" he lurched forward forgetting that there were two people in front of him. He knocked Dink into to Millicent, tripped over his own feet and they all landed in a heap one the floor.

"Terribly sorry, Mum." Said Dink, Pulling Millicent to her feet. Turning around he took off his had and smacked Smathers over the head with it.

"You big Ox what are you trying to do kill us!"

"But boss," said Smathers, "What are we going to do?"

"We are going to let the lady get out of the way first." Snapped Dink. Millicent stepped back from the doorway and the two men advanced on Peter who was standing calmly in the middle of the hard wood floor. Peter looked over and saw the worried look on Wendy's face. He grinned at her.

"Fear not for my safety, Milady," he said, "these guys couldn't catch a runaway door mat." At the last second the to men lunged but Peter lifted off the ground and turned a mid-air somersault over them. They hit the floor face down and slid into the closet hitting the shelf inside and knocking a spare lamp out off the top shelf.

"Uh Oh," said Smathers as he turned over and saw the lamp heading for their heads. CRASH! The lamp hit them broke and drenched them with lighting oil. Peter winced.

"That is definitely going to leave a mark," he said, "Don't you to know that a kid always wins against two idiots."

Smathers jumped and wiped lamp oil out of his eyes and tried to grabbed Peter who was now standing behind Wendy but Peter dodged his grasp every time. Suddenly with out any warning Peter leaned up from behind Wendy and kissed her cheek. She gasped and her hand flew to the kissed cheek. Smathers grabbed for Peter again and suddenly felt his pants dropped to his ankles. When Peter ducked he had cut Smathers belt in two. Smathers gave a yelp and tried to pull his pants up.

"Now, Now," Said Peter shaking a finger at Smathers, "Don't be-a droppin your drawers in the presence of a lady."

Smathers jerked his pants up so fast that He knocked himself backwards into Dink and they both fell out the door to land in the street.

"I told you they couldn't catch me." Said Peter grinning triumphantly. John and Michael were laughing so hard that they nearly fell off the Sofa. Wendy was still dazed from the kiss.

"I pick on those two all the time and I imagine I'll be at it again soon," Peter was interrupted by voices in the street.

" I can't see my official papers Smathers are they still there?"

"I don't know," replied Smathers, " I can't in the dark either boss, here I'll strike a match."

"No Smathers we're still covered in Lamp--,"

BOOM!! And there was a huge fireball right outside the Darling's front window.

"Oil," Dink finished weakly as he and Smathers, Who were covered in soot with their clothes blown to shreds, stood there a moment before keeling over.

Peter rolled his eyes,

"Make that as soon as they get out of the Hospital."

**The End: For Now **


End file.
